


blurred lines.

by starspangledpeaches



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Acting, Other, Stucky - Freeform, how does one use tags, very soft boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-06-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:14:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24854413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starspangledpeaches/pseuds/starspangledpeaches
Summary: emotions aren't black and white, especially when unwanted feelings are forced to be felt. sometimes he just has to remember that it doesn't reflect who he truly is.
Relationships: Chris Evans/Sebastian Stan, James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers
Comments: 2
Kudos: 26





	blurred lines.

**Author's Note:**

> a lil fic combining my four (?) favorite people ever ... enjoy!

The air was so dense, it was almost suffocating. The gazes the two soldiers gave to one another were anything but docile. Everything around them faded into the backdrop, and what was left were two bruised and beat-up men, but far from the same caliber. Breathing heavily, his suit wrapped around his body like a weighted blanket, the messy blonde stood without his signature shield, looking toward his so-called enemy. 

“You’re my friend,” He stated with every ounce of sincerity, his poignant stare never once leaving the brunette. The metal-armed soldier only toughened the angered expression, his already matted and dampened hair hiding half the pain in his eyes. But the other half was visible, wide awake, and fully flourishing, and there was no doubt that inside, it was uncontrollably burning. The fire was multiplying by the second and there was no stopping the waves of red and that dripped down into his aching chest and from the small creases on his forehead. 

And all that pent-up rage that kept the withered man’s heart beating as fast as the ammo that fired from his trustworthy gun had bursted at the seams, and he tumbled forward with a crackling roar, barreling his body onto the blonde, sending them flying into the hardened glass of the helicarrier with a bone-chilling thud. Two baby blues closed in pain as the grey pupils of the other glared down at his target. 

“You’re my mission,” The one-armed man spat, using what was left of his strength to pound his fist into the other’s face, punch after punch after punch until the blonde’s breath was barely leaving his lips. 

“You’re…” A punch landed on his jaw. “My…” Another dead-center to his left eye. “Mission!” The brunette finished him off with a hit straight in the face, watching as the patriot’s head flew back with ease, a cheek wound reeking what damage had been done by the unrelenting brunette, red painted on his cheekbone that followed to his swollen eye.

Hues of blue were replaced with blood-shot red, but there was no hint of fear or a shed of a tear. Instead, he only kept himself calm, breathing with what working lung he had left, simply allowing the moment to unfold without restraint. “Then finish it…” He replied, finally, his breath weakening. “...cause I’m with you till the end of the line.” 

With his metal fist held high and ready to punch, he froze in response, heart stopping. There was a moment that all the anger inside him only moved over so another terrible feeling could rise within him that felt too real to deny.

Pain... bubbling in the insides of his closed fists and in the air he breathed, and it seemed that the anger began to subside. The torture came from complete and utter loss. 

And that’s when Sebastian’s gaze widened, his eyes glossy and petrified, yet his heart beat with every memory of the past. He used it to his advantage, staring down at Chris who’s face was coated and covered in heavy prosthetics and fake blood, watching as his counterpart ‘failed’ to take in oxygen. He played the scene just how Bucky needed to feel in that moment. 

Before Sebastian could even blink, or process another feeling deep within, the director called a cut, and Sebastian watched as a teardrop fell onto Chris’ blue suit, his metal fist slowly lowering. 

Chris began to smile, a relieved exhale leaving his lips, and he grunted and groaned playfully as he sat up from his position. On the other hand, Sebastian, who now sat next to Chris, was a blinking mess, and he wiped his incoming tears away with his arm that wasn’t sitting in KY-jelly. Every blink brought him closer to reality— the walls around him transformed from the inside of a helicarrier to the bland and barren walls of the blue screen. He hadn’t realized Chris placed a sweaty hand on his shoulder until his Boston accent spoke into his ear. 

“You alright?” Chris questioned softly, sitting with his knees up, while Sebastian sat indian-style with one of his hands on his forehead. He couldn’t seem to respond, and all of his emotions were mixing into one giant shake of instability. Instead, Sebastian sighed, barely nodding. Of course, Chris didn’t take that as an answer, and resorted to giving a squeeze to his friend’s shoulder, persisting. “Emotions got the best of you?” He attended to Sebastian’s slightly shaken state, patiently watching Seb who took one last breath before a hefty chuckle followed as a release from the incredibly genuine emotions he’d just put himself through. 

“Yeah… yeah,” Seb replied, turning his head to face Chris, giving him a soft smile, balling and loosening his fist to battle with his nerves. His steel blues drifted to the side for a moment as he reeled in thought. “It’s like… a part of me gets lost inside him, you know?” Seb sighed, glancing back toward Chris. It was easier for him. Evans and Captain America weren’t very far off, and playing a stern and stable character versus one who suffered through trauma resulted in two different products of acting. For Sebastian, there was no way to fake it. Every single emotion Bucky had was because he made a promise to himself to live, breathe, and feel in his shoes. And in return, it caused a great deal of suffering and re-living through emotions Sebastian himself was reluctant to feel. 

“It’s a challenging feat when you gotta play someone like him, Seb. I mean, look at you,” Chris flashed a sort of sad smile, his thumb rising up to wipe at the watery surface just under Sebastian’s eyes in an effort to rid of it. “Not every actor has got the strength to dig so deep like you do. I mean that.” His voice was thick and promising, and Sebastian’s smile only grew wider with the compliment. And it was true. The sadness, pain, loss, and pure rage was wholeheartedly and completely Sebastian summoning every unwanted ounce of emotion he could gather. And though it practically killed him for a few moments after the cameras cut, he knew he was doing his job right. At least, at the end of the day, Bucky Barnes was just a compartment of emotions inside what made Sebastian Stan himself. It wasn’t all he ever knew how to feel, and sure as hell wasn’t who he was. 

That was what mattered to Seb, and as he told himself that, his brain began to simmer down and the wetness left from the tears had dried up, leaving what was the face of an accomplished individual. He eventually got onto his feet with his suit on his shoulders and one of his arms submerged into what was the essence of Bucky Barnes, though the untouched arm of his moved the clumps of hair out of his face so his vision was crystal clear as he walked off set with Evans by his side, who was relieved and thankful that the Sebastian Stan he knew and loved had climbed out from the shadows again to continue on with the day ahead.


End file.
